Worse than I thought (the pain that is)

Yesterday was the retrieval. All went well. We left at 6:30 to get to the clinic by 8 as there were some traffic issues on the expressway we needed to take on the way there. I was actually pretty relaxed and was surprised it did not take long at all. We were home by 11. I was apparently chatty with the nurse when I got back to my room but do not remember it at all. We have 14 eggs and will find out later today how many fertilized.

I was a little unprepared for how much pain I was going to be in. The retrieval was cake but the pain is way worse than I thought. I have read so many blogs and no one really talked about the pain. I felt like kicked in the ovaries and that everything was twisted around in there. Thank God for Tylenol extra strength. I slept for about 2 hours when I got back then just took it easy. Watched a movie, and just laid. I was just uncomfortable and a lot of pressure. Drank my Gatorade and V-8 which I love and need to become a regular drinker of. And two of my besties sent us cupcakes from a very good bakery here in our city. Soo yum and such a nice surprise. My husband has been a very good caretaker.

I took shower before bed and took some hydrocodone. Then I got into bed and broke down. No clue where it came from but I just cried. My husband totally consoled me. I have actually kept my emotions in check for most of this process, but I think it came to a head last night. It was the standard, 'this sucks' and 'it is not fair' and I know it was coming more from the pain I was feeling than anything else. I feel fine now once I let it out. I slept well despite the crazy dreams the hydrocodone provided and today I am back to being ready for the next step. Bring it on.

And I will say this, I commend all of those women out there who are going through this with jobs and other kids of their own. You are all amazing for taking it all on and getting through it! And for some more than one time. I could not imagine going through this while having a job. Last fall I presented an opportunity to my company I had been with the last 8 years to lay me off but give me a severance package, unemployment, letter of rec., etc. In this economy, I know that voluntarily giving up your job is unheard of, but my time there was over and I was so not happy. Lucky for me they gave me everything I asked for and I was on my way. My husband and I have made small sacrifices for me not to work but our plan was to have a baby and for me to stay home instead of paying for daycare. Plus at 35, I am at the point in my life where I need to decide what to be when I grow up.  I had a job not a career and I wanted to take some time while doing the pregnancy/mom thing, to concentrate on finding a career once our kids were in school.  Then infertility hit us and IVF was the only option. I slightly panicked about the money, time commitment, and sacrifices but thankful it could be my primary focus without letting work get in the way.

I am actually pretty calm and not antsy at all waiting to hear what fertilized. I feel a bit better today but still feeling dull pain in the ovary areas. I think I am going to do some reading now and magazine flipping.

UPDATE: of course as I was about to post this the lab called. Of the 14 eggs, 8 were mature enough to fertilize and 5 fertilized. So we are working with 5. Which is my husband and I's favorite number. It only takes one so although I wish it were more, I will look to the positive and take what we can get.