Remember the Dr. Suess book, "Oh, the Places You'll Go!" Typical college graduation gift, that book. And right now that one passage keeps jumping out at me...
you can get so confused
that you'll start in to race
down long wiggled roads at a break-necking pace
and grind on for miles across weirdish wild space,
headed, I fear, toward a most useless place.
The Waiting Place...
...for people just waiting.
That is where we are The Waiting Place. Not that fun let me tell you. But I am keeping my chin up.
While waiting we talked to the embryologist. Not the best meeting ever. We found out that 6 actually fertilized not 5, but not that it mattered, there were only 3 as of today. We had one embryo which was rated fair and one morula which is not an embryo (stage prior) and cannot be graded. We have one morula left that they will monitor and grow another day. We went forward with transferring two and hoping the other one remaining makes it to freeze tomorrow.
The transfer went well. Except while waiting I had to slightly empty my bladder to relieve myself then chug some more water to fill it back up. I waited too long to take my valium so I was not that relaxed during the procedure. Damn speculum and it was cold. Pretty cool to watch. I cannot believe the transfer literally takes less than 3 minutes. I got to pee after (thank God), got dressed and then we were on our way. I will say the car ride home was fun. We tried to stop to get a smoothie and I was walking like I was drunk and the place was closed due to a water issue. I passed out when I got home. I'm feeling a little bloated and crampy and have gone to the bathroom like 6 times already.
I think at this point all we can rely on is hope one or maybe both will get comfy in their natural habitat and stay. I of course looked things up online to see any success stories and it is 50/50. So I'll have faith in those two little beings inside. I believe in them. That they know we already love them and want them so bad and that they don't give up and are fighters just like their dad and me. I was raised Catholic and although I am not a big church goer, I do pray and believe religion is what you make of your relationship with God. And I have faith in Him. That he'll give us what we can handle, whatever it may be.
There will be no early testing. It's out of our control so it doesn't matter we might as well wait. I'm going to concentrate on remaining positive and taking care of my body, which are the things in my control.
The waiting sucks!!! I really had to work hard to entertain myself with things. I happened to have taken that week off of work before we even knew we were doing IVF. So I really needed to keep myself busy so I didn't analyze every twinge, tickle, or whatever I may have felt, or not felt...
ReplyDeleteGood luck to you and may the next 10 days go by super fast!
Oh and the religion thing...I totally agree with you....I'm not super religious/church goer, but I talk to God every day and I pray a lot. I think I have a pretty good relationship with God, even if I was mad at Him for a really long time...He still listened to me!
Keeping you in my thoughts and prayers!
I'm glad the transfer went well! We transferred two as well. I'm hoping for the best for both of us =)
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